i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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