I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
