when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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