I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
