Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
