I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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