Where is the hickey?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
