I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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