Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
