OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
