Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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