Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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