my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
