Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
