My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize