one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.