Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
