Soap is not a condiment
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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