Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
