drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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