I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Nobody cheats on THIS.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize