Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory http://tfl.nu/s661
  Replies (15) Good night (4134) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over. http://tfl.nu/i8gt
  Replies (10) Good night (748) Bad night (3719)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song http://tfl.nu/tlf6
  Replies (35) Good night (1660) Bad night (4383)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke! http://tfl.nu/q0f1
  Replies (39) Good night (7102) Bad night (2030)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere. http://tfl.nu/7gle
  Replies (22) Good night (6525) Bad night (1484)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning. http://tfl.nu/qol4
  Replies (5) Good night (3467) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch". http://tfl.nu/00r2
  Replies (18) Good night (5460) Bad night (1365)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night http://tfl.nu/l78r
  Replies (4) Good night (2806) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I have surprise drugs for everyone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I have surprise drugs for everyone http://tfl.nu/7gjj
  Replies (11) Good night (2844) Bad night (964)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon. http://tfl.nu/pw6n
  Replies (9) Good night (2068) Bad night (652)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (306): I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life. http://tfl.nu/odbf
  Replies (4) Good night (1208) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation http://tfl.nu/qkc0
  Replies (6) Good night (1487) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it. http://tfl.nu/f1b3
  Replies (2) Good night (1189) Bad night (686)
• Favorite

  (869): View more from St.Kitts and Nevis-Carib

  I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (869): I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible. http://tfl.nu/0c9k
  Replies (1) Good night (371) Bad night (774)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future. http://tfl.nu/z13j
  Replies (2) Good night (871) Bad night (275)

Randomize