3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
there is another microwave in the elevator.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
