im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize