And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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