beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.