jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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