Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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