But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
