Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
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