At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
