oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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