id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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