It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
He shit in the fireplace
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
