my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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