butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
