I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
