Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize