That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
PANTIES FOUND
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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