so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Randomize
