YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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