Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
false alarm, still single
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
