I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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