Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
