How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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