Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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