So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
