I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
