Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Boobs are out for the taking
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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