I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
