Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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